| Fan Fiction |
by ChaeYo
Poster/ Background: 10/10
The poster was awesome. It’s really cool. It shows a lot, from characters to their names and quotes. It’s not too happy looking and it could be sad. So it doesn’t give out to the reader exactly what the story is about. The background was really good too. It doesn’t hurt the eyes and it’s calm.
Forewords: 9/10
Your forwards were really good too. It gave off a little about Min Young’s past and her thoughts. Some of the characters were introduced too. The reader could get a feel about the story and how it’s going to be further on. This gave them the option to read on or stop. (Of course probably all of them read on :P)
Plot: 11/15
Your plot could be confusing at times but overall it was good. Even though stories like this are known, (about the girl that tries to be a star and is stuck between two guys) you played around with it well. Your story was very different with the death and the little kids and the adoption. Your story was simple but very interesting and the twists were great.
Flow: 6/10
Your flow was fine. I just think that sometimes if you are somewhere else or it is another day you should mention that instead of jumping directly to the next line. The flow was pretty fast at times, you would jump from one idea to another. My only problem about the flow was mostly the kids; they moved on about their past life really fast and started to call another girl ‘umma’ pretty fast too.
Creativity/ originality: 8/10
The story has its own ideas and creativity, but there are too many similar stories, as I said before. But you were able to balance out her life at home and at work and the guys/kids well. It was original in its own way because of all the different twists you added throughout. Also the album and stage name and fan club were extremely creative and original.
Spelling/ Grammar/ Vocabulary: 9/15
You have a few errors here and there. But you mentioned that English is not one of your first languages. Examples of mistakes would be “Do that somewhere else while you” it should be “will you”. And I realized that many times you haven’t put question marks after your questions. I would have usually put a 7 or 8, but because of the language barrier this is an exception. I also realized that you did much much better after the other reviewer mentioned spelling.
Characterization: 8 /10
Your characterizations were good most of the time. You were able to show us who they were well. You also shared her thoughts and inner ideas well. Also the people around her were well explained. Maybe you should have done more about Hankyung, share his thoughts more and maybe others like Onew as well. That would also be hard since you stuck to one POV.
Writing Style: 9/10
Your writing style was good. Even just as dialogue you were able to balance well and when you changed the style to more paragraphs it was better but still great. Your writing style is easy to follow along to and read. You weren’t confusing and kept th3e same style.
Overall Enjoyment: 4/5
I really enjoyed reading it, it was extremely interesting. I usually don’t read the stories of people entering an entertainment, but reading this was a change and made me feel like reading more of these.
Sub Total: 78/ 100
Bonus: 5/5
It was really interesting and you portrayed the characters well. Of course the bonus is for the SHINee boys and Super Junior.
Total: 83/100
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Thanks ILUV2PM @ http://adorable-luv.blogspot.com/ for the review ^^