| Fan Fiction |
by CherryChocol8
How could I have ever thought the opposite possible?
I had thought him to have a girlfriend..
..before I became delusional, thinking I might have a chance..
No one as good looking as him.. if they even existed.. wouldn't have a girlfriend.
It was just so unfair!
~
The next class passed in a blur.
I wasn't able to concentrate at school anymore.
My mind drifted off to the scene I had missed..
The moments when that girl took ChangMin's attention..
..when they would have left together..
Maybe holding hands..
I had seen them come back.
ChangMin had dropped her hand when they entered, probably to keep their relationship a secret..
In the split second he dropped her hand I saw disappointment in the girl her eyes.
In all the seconds I think of the look on her face and try to feel better, I simply can't deny the fact she's still his girlfriend and I'm just a project partner..
~
Since I couldn't focus on class, time seemed to fly by.
It seemed class lasted for only ten minutes.
Counting every moment I did think about something school related, it must be even less than ten minutes.
When the bell went, I realized I hadn't taken any notes..
NiMa realized that too (of me not taking notes, she did take them herself) and said: 'I'll mail them to you! Next time, please do take notes. You always do!'
I did, I always did take notes..
That's the reason she'll mail her's to me, because I had often send mine to her.
Basically, she owed me her's..
I stuffed my things in my bag and walked out of the classroom, I wanted to get home as quickly as I could.
When I left school it was still quiet at the school yard.
It was strange to leave school as one of the first, since I usually hung out with NiMa near the lockers.
During this year we would be waiting for Gina, Yuri, Jenny, HeeChul and EunHyuk after school.
All earlier years at high school we would wait for the friends we had there..
I wasn't in the mood to wait for them and be "happy together" since I was far from feeling happy and I've totally had it with HeeChul..
I realized I was not going to like him more since I needed to give up on ChangMin..
Because I only liked him less, because he liked me too much..
..and I couldn’t give up on ChangMin anyway..
NiMa was okay with me leaving directly, since I threatened not to ask my brother to her party..
I know it was cruel to blackmail her that way, but it was an emergency, in my opinion.
I had a strong urge to cry..
How was I ever able to compete with ChangMin's girlfriend, it seemed all world was against it..
Even NiMa didn't like ChangMin, she wouldn't support me chasing after ChangMin..
And then, it probably wasn't even worth trying to, since even his girlfriend didn't get all his love..
~
The whole bus drive I had been thinking about him..
It got difficult to hold my tears back, but I forced my eyes to stay dry.
Once I set foot in my own room I let them flow.
'Saranghae, ChangMin!' I cried softly into my pillow.
I kept loving him, although he had hurt me more than once already.
When all the tears I had were shed into my pillow, my eyes hurt and were red.
I went to the bathroom and washed my face.
When I was somewhat cooled down I went downstairs.
I still needed to ask my brother to NiMa's birthday..
I found my brother behind the TV, zapping channels between entertainment programs.
Clearly bored..
'DongJae! What are you doing?' I asked, acting a bit happier than I really was..
'Can't you see?' Came the reply.
I sighed, it didn't matter anyway, my brother would still stay a spoiled kid..
'Deh, I can see! But you're not doing anything, zapping is doing nothing..'
'Well, then you see I'm doing nothing..'
'Since you're doing nothing, I have a question.. Will you come to NiMa's birthday, she wants you to be there..'
Fingers crossed! Say yes, please!
'When?' His reply was absent-minded..
'This weekend..'
'I can't, I have a date on Saturday.'
'WHAT?! Since when have you broke up with, what's her name..?'
How could my brother be such a heartbreaker?
He didn't get dumped, so it seemed, since I never saw him being sad over a girl..
'Her name was Dessy and I broke up with her today.. if you must know..'
I could hit my brother, poor girl, he was being so unmoved over the fact that they broke up.
Well, truth is, she should have known that to happen, before she dated DongJae..
Sooner or later, DongJae would have to date a girl who'd dump him..
..and let him feel how all of his ex-girlfriends have felt..
~
'DaMae? Can you help me?'
The voice of my mother came from the kitchen.
I went to the kitchen to see what she wanted.
'I'd like you to make kimchi today, so your appa and I can finish the rearrangement of the store.. Will you do that for us? We will be back before diner.'
Well, I couldn't say no, could I, so I agreed and started taking preparations..
My brother was still zapping channels, I could hear all kinds of fragments of programs..
He might not allow himself to be sad about their break-up, he did seem to be more absent-minded than usual..
~
My kimchi was tasting good, according to my appa, who didn't say it, but ate more than he normally does.
DongJae was also eating like he hadn't eaten in a week, but that was nothing new since he always did that..
My mother and I were small eaters.
I took after my mother and my brother took after my father.
I guess that makes me so different from DongJae, nobody has ever seen a resemblance in our personalities..
What makes it ironic is that we look a lot like each other from the outside.
~
After diner, the dishes were all DongJae's.
As usual he tried to get himself out of it, by stating he had to do some homework..
.. but umma didn't fall for it.
'DongJae, watching TV isn't part of your school activities, so you'd better do some "housework", instead of your supposed "homework".'
I fled the kitchen, before I would burst out laughing and would need to help him with the dishes.
You should have seen the face of DongJae, he was pouting like a kid, grabbing a sponge and furiously started washing the first plates.
~
At my own room my mood started to cloud again..
I was getting depressed, no good!
I turned on my stereo and started listening to my music.
Then I checked my mail, NiMa had already sent me the notes of the last class..
My heart stopped beating for a second..
There was a mail from ChangMin!
How did he get my e-mail address?
Well, it didn't matter.. he sent me an e-mail!!
I was all about smiles again..
How easy he could make me smile.. if only he kept doing that!
I opened the mail to see what was inside..