Fan Fiction |
by Carmen Yip
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(21 June 2004 – Monday – campus — Prof Chan’s office - morning)
She took the courage to open his diary again…
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10 June, Thursday
We went for dinner today as Roger wasn’t free to keep her accompany. I secretly prayed for Roger to be occupied for as long as it can be. We went to the beach, and it was such a nice feeling having her leaning against me.
I wonder if she was hinting that she knew I like her. But I still felt uneasy. I wanted so much to tell her that. I never learn it was so hard to suppress my feelings, until today…
I yearned so much to shout it out loud. I love you! I love you Flora! Did you hear that? Silly me! I know you won’t hear me. I wish I could be your pillow…
+++
15 June, Tuesday
Ada joined us for lunch today and became our ‘light bulb’, but I didn’t really mind. As long as I do get to see her, why would I mind? But how long can this kind of days last? 15 days! Just 15 days more and I’ll lose her for good! I’ll not get to see her as frequent as I do, I’ll not get to hear her lovely voice, I’ll not get to see her smile.
Her smile! How I love her smile! It was the most beautiful thing in the whole universe, it was the one and only thing that could keep me going and my heart in place for the 20 days I was madly in love with her!
I know we wouldn’t have a happy ending, but I do want Happy Teddy and Little Piglet to end up together, and live happily ever after in my novel. I’m not sure whether I would still be alive 15 days later, but I’m sure my heart would be dead then.
Today we passed by the travel agency, and I took some brochures for reference. I know I will need them pretty soon. Escape! That was the only thing I dare to do! Flora, how am I to tell you… I love you!
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17 June, Thursday
Gone! She is gone! Gone with the wind! Gone with fate! I was so stupid! I shouldn’t have been so absurd! I hate myself! I loathed myself for hurting her!
Now she would never forgive me again. She would not see me again! What am I to do?
It hurt me so much when I saw her vanishing before me! My heart cried again, but I actually shed tears too! That was because I knew I had to leave earlier than planned. I have to leave her, and I hate to do so! But what can I do? She refused to pick up my calls. From that minute, I felt my poor heart was bleeding. I used my hand to press on it, in a bid to suppress the pain. The next minute, I found my hands stained with blood. Blood that was dripping within my heart!
I went through the brochures again, and made my plans ahead… Goodbye forever, Flora…
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She flipped to the next page, there was neither dates nor words. Instead, there was a drawing. It was colored black and shades of grey. In the middle of the page was the drawing of a piglet in wedding dress. It was smiling so happily, seemingly ignoring every living and non-living things around it. The sky was grey, dark grey! Somewhere at the corner, was a little bear waving goodbye. It carried a smile on his face, but it was apparently crooked.
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She could imagine his trembling hand when he drew this! He loved her! He loved her so much! Unexpectedly!
Uncontrollably, streams of tears had found their way down from her cheek to join the lonely picture. She felt her heart aching. She wishes she had never read the diary. It would only make her feel so guilty, and an additional feeling. She searched her heart, but couldn’t tell what it was!
A knock on the door had disturbed her thoughts. She wiped away her tears as quickly as possible, and uttered an ‘enter please’. He entered. There he was! Right before her! She hid the diary behind her hastily, and stay rooted to her position. He walked towards her.
GALLEN: Flora… (he looks deeply into her eyes) Sorry I didn’t mean to disturb you. But I am just here to bid goodbye to you. (forces a smile)
She stood up, and the diary fell out. He went forward to pick it up.
FLORA: Erm…
GALLEN: It’s my diary! How come it’s with you?
FLORA: I’m sorry… Ada took it from you that day…
GALLEN: No wonder I couldn’t find it! (he held the diary dearly against his chest) So you’ve read it?
FLORA: (bits her lips and nods) Sorry…
GALLEN: It’s ok. It must be fate to let you know of it…
FLORA: I’m sorry…
GALLEN: You don’t need to be sorry. I should be the one saying sorry, I shouldn’t have had any fantasies about you… Please just pretend you didn’t read it, ok?
FLORA: How can I just pretend? Teach me!
GALLEN: I’m sorry to have caused you distress, but I will leave you alone soon…
FLORA: Where are you going?
GALLEN: Anywhere, I won’t stay on… it would be so meaningless for me to stay on, and especially since you have known of it…
FLORA: Actually you don’t have to leave…
GALLEN: You won’t understand. You’re not me. You won’t know what I’m going through… Facing the person I love everyday but yet she is so unreachable…
FLORA: (brimming with tears) I’m sorry, I didn’t know it all along…
GALLEN: I don’t intend to let you know anyway. But since you’ve found out, can I have a last request before I leave?
FLORA: Just speak your mind.
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PS: Awww... I dunno if I have fulfilled the pre-requisites of the chp name, but well... What request would Gallen make? Make a guess!