| Fan Fiction |
by Micah
…his and Yoochun’s home.
Junsu felt his heart break a little more and couldn’t believe that it was still possible. He looked down at the beauty who was still mumbling incoherently.
“Yoochun,” Junsu whispered as he touched the older man’s cheek. His fingers brushed the hair from Yoochun’s eyes and laid a hand on his forehead. He recalled the times when he had made fun of Yoochun’s wide forehead.
His hand traveled down to Yoochun’s chest. He laid his palm above Yoochun’s beating heart. He recalled the countless times he had laid his head on this area, listening to the heartbeat.
One last time. He wanted to hear it one last time. It was a bad idea. But…just…one last time. Please.
Junsu carefully moved aside and laid Yoochun’s head onto the couch. By now, Yoochun was unconscious again, deeply asleep. Junsu knelt down next to the furniture and rested his head on Yoochun’s chest. It wasn’t a comfortable position, causing a slight pain in his neck, but Junsu didn’t care.
He heard the heartbeat.
It hurt.
He heard the heartbeat and he finally cried. The teardrop escaped from the corner of his eye and trickled onto Yoochun’s shirt, right above the drunken man’s heart.
One last time. This was the last time.
He stayed in that position, closing his eyes and feeling so tired. He wanted to sleep. But he couldn’t. He wasn’t allowed.
After what felt like second, Junsu heard Changmin’s voice. Was it ten minutes already? But it had been such a short ten minutes.
“I swear my friend is here! He texted me and specified this room!” Changmin was shouting.
“Sir, I can’t have you stampeding in like this! Why don’t you call your friend and…” the hostess was saying.
Junsu quickly opened the door to the room to see them. “He’s my friend,” he assured the hostess.
The hostess turned to look at the angry, tall man. Then she looked at Junsu and bowed before departing.
“Man, what’s up with hostesses these days?” Changmin grumbled as he walked into the VIP room.
“Maybe if you didn’t look like a stampeding mad man, she wouldn’t have tried to stop you,” Junsu countered as he closed the door.
“What the heck?” Changmin saw Yoochun lying unconscious on the couch.
“He was just in a meeting with Mr. Bae,” Junsu explained. “It seemed like he was there to get drunk rather than talk business.”
Changmin nodded, knowing the client by the name. “I guess he wants to get drunk because he’s so upset about being away from you.”
Junsu frowned. “He’s upset, but only because he hates me. He doesn’t like that I’d made a fool out of him and hurt his family.”
“Is that supposed to upset him so much that he’d want alcohol poisoning?”
“Changmin, I didn’t call you here to interrogate me.”
“Then why am I here?” Changmin cocked an arrogant eyebrow at him. It pissed him off that no matter how many times he’d try to convince Junsu that Park Yoochun was in love with him, it still wouldn’t get through the man’s head.
Junsu was too afraid of hoping, of believing. He was too afraid of being hurt.
But Changmin couldn’t push any further or do more than slip in little comments of his own. After all, he didn’t know for sure that Park Yoochun really was in love with Kim Junsu. Nor did he have a right to be playing ‘God’ in someone else’s love life when his own heart was still broken.
It wouldn’t help to tell Junsu that Changmin spent most of his days making sure his cell phone was charged so that he could stare at the contents of his cell phone every minute of the day.
“I used your name when I got the clients to sign the contract. We’re going to pretend that you helped Yoochun.”
“What?”
“Jung Yunho is on his way. If I predicted correctly, the others will follow him,” Junsu didn’t have to say that the ‘others’ would included Kim Kibum. “They should be here any minute now. I’m leaving.”
“What? But…”
“You’re smart. Don’t make me explain. Just play along.”
“Junsu…”
Junsu took long strides and was out of the room in seconds. The door closed and the sound of it pounded into Changmin’s brain. He mumbled a curse and turned to look at the unconscious man on the couch.
An idea came to mind.
Changmin walked over and started slapping Park Yoochun’s cheeks, lightly of course. “Ya! Wake up!”
Yoochun grumbled something that Changmin couldn’t hear. He tried again, slapping a little bit harder this time. “Wake up!”
“Go away,” Yoochun murmured.
“Are you in love with Kim Junsu?”
The door was suddenly kicked open and Changmin nearly jumped out of his skin. He mumbled a curse when he saw the three men standing at the door. “Damn it! What is wrong with people and ruining doors?” he exclaimed, although he was more pissed off at the fact that they had interrupted before he could get an answer out of Park Yoochun.
“Kim Junsu?” the drunken Yoochun reacted to the name. “Kim Junsu…”
“What is going on?” Yunho and Jaejoong immediately ran past Changmin to get to the mumbling Yoochun.
Kibum stood at the door, staring at Changmin with sad eyes. Changmin felt the painful feeling in his heart when he looked into Kibum’s eyes.
“Yoochun, are you okay?” Yunho’s voice interrupted and Changmin had to turn his head to look at the group of three.
“Kim Junsu,” Yoochun continued to murmur. “Kim Junsu.”
“He’s not here,” Jaejoong informed.
“Why does he keep repeating Junsu’s name?” Yunho voiced their curiosity.
“Maybe because he misses Junsu,” Changmin spoke with an attitude. He looked at Yunho’s face for a jealous reaction. There was none. Then he emphasized each word of this statement, “Maybe Park Yoochun is in love with Kim Junsu.”
“No, no, no!” Yoochun shook his head, wanting to shake away the dizziness. Squinting eyes, he grabbed onto Yunho’s shoulder so that they were face to face. “No! I love you, but I hate him! I love you, but I hate him!”
He kept repeating the same statement with slurred words while the others stared at each other in shock.
Jaejoong, and Yunho were distracted. Kibum still stood at the door, his eyes noticing everything about Changmin, wanting to leave a lasting image. He even noticed when Changmin’s eyes darted and from the corner of his eyes, he saw the figure that had run past the door of the room, behind Kibum.
Kibum felt the presence behind him and turned his head to barely see the back of the figure that had turned the corner. Was it just one of the karaoke bar’s customers?
Kibum didn’t know. But Changmin knew that it was Junsu. Junsu had seen Yoochun grabbing onto Yunho’s shoulders and shouting, “I love you, but I hate him!”
Changmin turned back to look at Park Yoochun, clenching his fist and wanting so much to punch him. But he had turned back to see Park Yoochun holding onto Kim Jaejoong’s shoulders and shouting the same statement to the blond man.
The guy was too drunk to even see who he was speaking to!
So did he even know WHAT he was saying?
Did he know who the ‘you’ and the ‘him’ in his ‘I love you, but I hate him’ are?
-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-
“So what are you going to do? Follow him day and night?”
“I’ll admit. I’ve been following him around. I just…I just want to see him as much as I can before I leave.”
“You’re an idiot.”
“You are as well. I saw the opportunity and tried to turn it into a chance for you to talk to Kibum. You didn’t. You just walked out.”
Changmin frowned. “Junsu, I know what you’re trying to do. All I can tell you is…don’t. Just…don’t.”
“I owe it to you.”
“Fate just isn’t on our side. We weren’t meant to be.”
“Why not? When you love him and he loves you?”
“I don’t even know if he loves me anymore,” Changmin paused. “And don’t you dare go lecturing me about it! That would make you a hypocrite too.”
Junsu sighed. “The problem with life is that love is too often in the unknown.”
“Does that mean you still have a bit of hope that perhaps Park Yoochun’s love for you is just in the unknown? That it exists?”
“No,” Junsu frowned. “Hopes are dangerous, Changmin. Disappointment can be deadly.”
Changmin sighed. “I don’t even know what to say to you anymore. But do know that after you ran out of the karaoke bar last night, Park Yoochun was grabbing onto Kim Jaejoong shoulders and shouting the same statement to him. The ‘I love you’ may not have been directed to Jung Yunho.”
“It’s easier to just admit that the ‘you’ in his statement was Jung Yunho and the ‘him’ in ‘I hate him’ is me.”
“Easy isn’t always best. What if the ‘you’ and ‘him’ are both you? Maybe he’s in love with the innocent and sweet ‘you’ that you were pretending to be and the ‘him’ that Yoochun hates is the ruthless and selfish you that he thinks you are.”
“Do you listen to yourself when you talk?” Junsu raised an eyebrow at him.
“I try not to,” Changmin retorted. “I have to get to work. Are you going to be trailing him again today?”
“No, I need to pack. I think I caught a cold last night so I better rest,” Junsu explained as he rubbed lightly at his temple.
“I don’t want you to leave Seoul, Junsu,” Changmin spoke bluntly. Junsu looked up at him; he looked like a sad baby.