Fan Fiction |
by Hibiscus
Why was it always like this? He wondered. Why did it always have to hurt? If this was love, he didn’t want any part of it.
“Great, I’ll just enter a monastery, become a monk.” He muttered to himself.
He closed his eyes and then immediately opened them as he saw Ariel beam at him in extravagant colour in his head. “This is so unfair; she’s even in my head.”
He sat up and smiled bitterly again. “A man in his prime, that’s what you are, He Jun Xiang. And you are sitting alone at home, in the dark, thinking about a girl whom you can’t have, who you shouldn’t even be thinking about.”
He lay back on the couch. “It’s just not fair. I saw her first. I loved her first.” He punched his chest and breathed heavily. “Shit.”
“You also hurt her first, He Jun Xiang. You made her cry.” He told himself. “He never did. He makes her laugh and she glows. She sparkles and the world holds its breath.”
“Shit.” And he laid his head in his arms.
“Breathe, He Jun Xiang. You can’t cry. You didn’t cry then, you won’t cry now, you won’t cry ever. There’s no one here to wipe your tears. There never was. “
Mike closed his eyes as another wave of anguish hit him. He got up, picked up the glass top off the coffee table and threw it against the wall. Glass shattered.
“So you gotta pretend, He Jun Xiang. Smile and pretend. You are an actor, for God’s sakes. Pretend that all she is… is a friend. That you don’t think about her all the time. That she won’t let you sleep because when you close your eyes, all you can see is her. And that when you breathe, you don’t feel her essence in the air and you don’t breathe in deeper, so you can have some sort of contact with her. You can do it, man. Fool him. Fool her. Fool the world. And shit, if you pretend hard enough and long enough, maybe, just maybe, you can fool yourself.”
For a minute he stood still, breathing harshly. Then suddenly his doorbell rang and he toyed with the idea of ignoring it. But it rang again, insistently, loudly. Mike stood a moment longer, trying to compose himself, trying to get his emotions in order. Then he walked to the door and opened it.
Rainie stood on his doorstep, a bright smile in place and a package in her hand.
“Took you long enough, He Jun Xiang.” She growled with faux anger. Mike smiled distractedly.
“To what do I owe the pleasure of your company, Rains?” Mike said stretching.
“Well, I know you are leaving for a while and I was in the area so I went to visit your Grandma and she gave a present for you.” Rainie replied.
“Sorry, I’m so rude. Come in.” Mike said belatedly realizing that they were talking on the doorstep.
“No. I am on my way to one of those horrid parties so I have to run. I just wanted to see you before you left. Now for the presents.” Rainie placed the package carefully on the floor beside her and reached out and gave Mike a hug, clinging to him for a second before disengaging herself.
“And the brownies your Grandma makes that you love so much. I had one too; okay two but I deserve it, right? Great, thanks for agreeing!”
Rainie hugged Mike again and then left, leaving Mike holding the package of brownies with a smile that was a bit more certain.
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Author's note: I is done writing la ficcione. El ficcione? Whatever. Yo soy muy cansada pero dormire luego. Sorry, um anyway. Thanks for reading folksies, even when I dont make sense.