| Fan Fiction |
by Andra
Before I start, I'd like to apologize in advance if I offend you or criticize you. I will not insult you for sure. I am only giving you a honest review. I'm very sorry if you get mad. Don't get mad at the site, get mad at me but keep in mind I make sure all the writers get a honest review. I'm sorry if your not satisfied with the honesty. Good luck.
Title 3/5
Not very eye catching but it does show what the story is about.
Poster/Background 6/10
I don't think the background & poster don't match. It was kind of hard for me to read the font. At certain parts I had to highlight them to see what the word was. I think the poster was a bit higher then decent.
Forewords 9/10
A LOT of characters. Hard to memorize but you did tell us a little bit about each and every one of them.
Plot 13/15
The plot was quite alright. I mean, at times I didn't get it but after a while, I got it.
Creativity/Originality 13/15
I don't think your story is unique but it's not common either. Your creativity was above average. Good job!
Flow 9/10
Flow went great. Not too slow but not too fast.
Spelling/Grammar/Vocab. 6/10
Wrong -> "coackroach" Correct -> "cockroach." Also you might want to space your periods & exclamation marks & etc. out. Wrong -> "car was parked.A young man,dressed in a black" Correct -> "car was parked. A young man, dressed in a black" You should space things out after every comma, periods, question marks, etc. etc. Also you don't need to have so many commas. Example: ".The members were in a hurry,because they were l-" Correct -> "The members were in a hurry because they were l-" Most commas belong when its a long sentence or if there is a pause in between.
Writing Style 7/10
I really don't like script writing. Script style are for scripts. Most scripts are used for a play or something. To me reading someones fanfic would be in paragraph form like the books. Your writing was very detailed & okay.
Characterizations 9/10
Your characterizations are pretty decent. There was that little "*worried*" words in the script which told me how they were feeling.
Overall Enjoyment 4/5
I think you need some work until you'll have the perfect story but this was pretty good. I enjoyed reviewing this. I'm sorry if your hurt in anyway BUT reviews are to help writers IMPROVE. I hope I helped you improve in someway. I'm very sorry if you're mad at me. My apologies are sincere. Hope you request again.!
Total 79/100 C+ (Good job!)