| Fan Fiction |
by babygiggle
Matches the story; however, The Devil’s Toy is a common title that is used many times by authors. If someone had been browsing Winglin for a fanfic, I doubt they would’ve been hooked by the title.
Poster/Background: 9/10
Forewords: 9/10
I automatically deducted some of the points because you didn’t give the readers any introduction in the Forewords. Next time, write a teaser to hook in readers. But, I gave you some more points because of the character introductions.
Plot: 13/15
A lot of fanfiction in Winglin now revolve around kidnapping and so on, but yours really drew me in.
Creativity/Originality: 14/15
Like I said, a lot of plots revolve around yours. But you portrayed it well, so good job.
Flow: 8/10
Some sentences were choppy, others hard to understand, but most were smooth and the flow was okay.
Spelling/Grammar/Vocab: 7/10
Work on your grammar and spelling. The mistakes were easy to find and they stand out, so that ruined the flow. Please work on it later.
Writing Style: 8/10
Hooked and easy to read. Improvements would be nice, but for now, you did just fine.
Chracterizations: 10/10
I liked the way each character has changing moods and personalities. You portrayed that nicely.
Overall Enjoyment: 4/5
Like I said, you have mistakes that are obvious, but I enjoyed your story very much.
Total 86/100