| Fan Fiction |
by biniBningPunkista
I learned his name was Yamapi. There weren’t much pictures of him inside the house except for those family pictures that were displayed all throughout the living room, but the place was pretty big for a bachelor’s home. He snorted at my question which made me re-evaluate what’s funny with it.
“You know… you look vaguely familiar. It feels like I’ve seen you somewhere.” I scratched my chin trying to remember but all I could think of was a certain profile and nothing else.
When the pancakes were covered Yamapi stared at me then said, “You can cut the act now. I’ve been thinking about it all last night, I know what you are. You’re one of those die-hard fans who want to get my attention right? Now you’ve got it. You’ve already spent the night in my home; even got an autographed newspaper from me… what else do you want? Sleep with me?” He scoffed as he flipped the pan to cook the other side of the pan-cake.
I was amazed at his cooking skills but the things he was telling me didn’t make sense at all. Besides, why would I want to sleep with him? He may be my hero as of the moment and he may be a fine looking guy... well fine looking would be an understatement now that I’ve got to have a good look at him. Yamapi is beyond that description but I am not sleeping with him in exchange with all the help he gave.
“My body is not for sale.” I told him flatly.
“Excuse me?” Yamapi cocked his head in disbelief.
“Why would I even want to sleep with you? I know you saved my life and everything but that doesn’t mean I would want to sleep with you. The newspaper, I needed it to find a job. If you want it that badly,” I ran towards the room and took the paper out of my bag and went back to the kitchen to hand it over to him, “I’m giving it back. Here…” I reached out the paper towards him. He looked at me like he was seeing an alien.
“Are you serious?” He said with an incredulous look on his face.
“Why would I joke?” I stared at him blankly.
My reply made him shake his head. He took the news paper from my hand, laid it on the counter and opened it to a certain page. There was a huge picture of a man. One whole page was dedicated for him. I looked at it closely then back at the guy who was standing in front of me.
My jaw dropped.
“You really didn’t know?” He asked in a dainty tone this time.
I shook my head no.
“Really… this makes me evaluated how popular I am. I’m wounded.” Yamapi placed his hand on his chest acting as if he was hurt. Once more he flipped the pancakes and caught it in a plate.
“Here you go,” He said while placing the pan-cake in front of me then asked again, “Are you sure you didn’t know?”
“No. It also makes me wonder why you have that police badge last night.” I pointed out to him.
“That’s for props; I played as a con-artist in my previous movie.” He answered in a matter of fact.
Once more I was impressed at him. He must be a really great actor that he gets to have one whole page for himself in the lifestyle section of a news paper. Then my mind brought me back to how he pretended to be a policeman last night to help me out. Yamapi did it without showing any sign of pretention.
He was really good. I concluded to myself and then my eyes fell back on his picture in the news paper. An idea popped into my head that I almost fell out of my seat as I hurriedly dashed back to the room to retrieve a pen. When I got back, I shoved the pen towards Yamapi.
“Sign that.” I demanded.
Yamapi was taken aback by my sudden attitude but he gingerly took the pen and signed the paper.
“Great!” I cried out while raising the paper upward to look at the autographed picture.
“How much do you think this would cost if I sell it to a huge fan of yours?”
Yamapi’s eyes grew big with disbelief.
“No you won’t…” He groaned out loud.
“Yes I would and thanks for the food. Ittadakimasu!!!” I exclaimed as he continued to give me a bewildered look.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
First she took my newspaper, second she had me saving her ass out there, third she got me to let her stay in MY house and lastly… she gets to earn money through me. Who is this girl that she turns the table against me overnight?
I scratched my head as I looked over the window at Inoue Mao’s retreating back. This was supposed to be a break. My first real break from a rigorous scheduling but what happened? A naïve girl messed my plans to a relaxing weekend. Why did my altruistic nature have to kick in at the wrong time?
Then the image of her being pimped out helplessly made me shudder at the thought and that… I could never take in my conscience.
It was a coincidence that I was reading a newspaper and she needed it, as it was also a coincidence that I was passing through the ally for a short cut when she was being dragged forcefully by two men and the biggest coincidence of all is her contemplating in front of my house after I have already helped her get a part time job. It’s like she’s everywhere and anywhere I go, haunting me in a very annoying way.
Then a thought came through my mind, something that could humor me in my dysfunctional head today. Since my schedule is wiped out clean for a couple more days I’m taking a look into a prospective real life character – putting it in the category of ‘Studying’.
I took my favorite cowboy hat and beeline shades then walked out into the sun to trudge after this trouble-magnet girl. Maybe she would continually amuse me in her idiotic case. This made me smile and looked forward into my mischief.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Damn Inoue Mao and those puppy eyes. Now I feel like a stalker and a hero that helps out stupid girls in distress.
This wasn’t supposed to be my character. I was only supposed to be the watcher here, nothing more! I knew she was trouble from the very start. Why did I even get myself involved with her in the first place? Following her was supposed to be an amusement, not a charity case.
This was getting more absurd by the minute.
Earlier that morning I followed her through the streets, trying to be discreet in my favorite disguise. A couple of people have been giving me suspicious looks but that was better than to be discovered and suddenly be mugged by fans. That horrible experience was something I don’t want happening to me again anytime soon. The girl went from building to building looking for a job but each time she came out she looked dejected, then she would smarten up and square her shoulders to go to the next establishment on her list.
How silly of her to do something like job hunting on a Saturday.
I shook my head in disbelief and wondered where she might be staying for the night. It was obvious she was desperate but it looked like it was nothing for her that everything would be alright. This nagging feeling inside me couldn’t help but admire that naivety and look of innocence.
The girl entered another building while clutching the newspaper in her hand. It was a beauty salon and after a couple of minutes; she came out with a huge smile in her face. Clearly she wasn’t accepted because she got out of the building faster than the others she’s been too. Apparently this made me dead curious as to why she was grinning like that. So I followed her once again until lunch time was setting in. I was being reminded by the constant growl in my stomach which has been complaining for quite some time already. I stared ahead and searched for that tiny bob of a head which is slowly being drowned by the crowd in the street. I knew it was already time to leave her alone; I’ve already followed her enough to amuse me and she’s old enough to take care of herse…
My eyes went wide when I saw what was happening before me. A man standing behind her just grabbed her butt. This made her turn around and look at who did it, but the man pretended like nothing happened. When Mao once again waited for the traffic light the man did it again. It was very aggravating to see a sexual harasser on TV but seeing it in real life was more infuriating. I strode up to where Mao and the man stood, grabbed the asshole’s arm and twisted it behind his back casually so as not to cause any commotion. Mao’s eyes stared at me, looking totally bewildered.
“Apologize.” I ordered him.
“What are you talking about?!?” The man tried to look innocent.
“You’re a one ass-groping-asshole and I hate seeing you do it in front of me. Now apologize to her.” I told him harshly this time.
“You’ve mistaken me for someone else.” The man still kept up with his pathetic lie.
“That does it.” I twisted his arm some more that I’m sure it was causing him so much pain, then I coughed before shouting out loud, “This man is a sexual harasser! If anyone gets within a five meter radius from him, make sure your butts are secured. Please, make sure to remember this disgusting face!” Then I kicked the back of his knee to make him kneel down on the street right in front of Mao.
“Are you still not going to apologize?” I told him threateningly.
“S-sorry… I didn’t mean it.” The man bowed before Mao as she looked from me then back to the man.
She was speechless, so I left the man alone and grabbed Mao by her arm and dragged her to the other side of the street before the people realized who I was. They have already started to whisper my name.
“I’m hungry.” I told her casually while I dragged her some more.
“Thank you.” It’s all she said then tugged her arm back, when I looked at her something was glistening from the corner of her eyes and she looked like she was in shock.
“Hey… everything’s alright now.” I reassured her.
“But… but…” She started to put her arms across her chest as if trying to protect herself then continued on saying, “he touched my butt! Not once. Twice!” She shouted with an incredulous look on her face.
Her face was clearly horrified by the realization and here I was, trying hard not to laugh but I can’t. My pursed lips started to gush out air and then I started to laugh uncontrollably. Heaving to breathe… it wasn’t supposed to be funny but seeing her VERY delayed reaction was really that funny. I had to stops myself by stamping my foot on the ground.
“It’s not funny.” Mao grumbled at me as she angrily wiped those threatening tears on her eyes.
I slightly removed my sun-glasses to wipe my own tears. The girl really was naïve and stupid, I thought it would go away overnight but no… it gets worse by the day.
“Hey, I’m curious. Why are you so happy when you came out of that last building earlier?” My curiosity was still at its height.
“How did you know about that?” She asked looking completely surprised.
“Coincidence...” I lied.
“So…?” I urged her to answer.
Mao leaned closer to me then whispered.
“Did you know that you really are famous?”
This made me look at her like she was really a cat.
“I really have no idea.” I replied sarcastically.
“Well you are.” She said casually and continued, “I got to exchange your autograph signed newspaper-picture for money. It is enough for me to rent a room in a motel and eat at least 5 meals.”
Mao grinned at me as she did earlier. I was taken-aback. She was serious when she told me she would sell it.
“I could thank you now by offering to buy you food… but that would be taking out a meal from my budget. Maybe you could cook for two instead?” She suggested using her big puppy eyes to convince me.
Damn those eyes!
------------------To be continued------------------
Notes from the Author:
I could totally imagine Mao in her puppy eyes and Yamapi in his distressed state. *kon* *kon*