| Fan Fiction |
by Chandra
She fought off the frustration and loneliness as she drove faster than usual. Tavia had no one else to blame but herself. She ruined both Raymond’s life and hers. His heart belonged to her sister. And hers desired for someone else’s.
The tears ran endlessly down her cheeks as she drove. What had she done? All her life, she had done nothing right. Yet Tavia hoped this time she was doing the right thing by leaving Raymond. She had owed Rain so much.
She was about a mile or so from her destination when some small animal suddenly darted out from the bush into the road, its eyes gleaming, terrified, in the glare of her oncoming headlights. Slamming on her brakes, Tavia swerved sharply to avoid hitting the startled creature, and as she did so, her front tire struck something - whatever it was on the road, that caused her to have a blowout.
But as Tavia slowly got out to inspect the damage, that wasn’t much a comfort either. She stared in dismay at her flat tire and then at the horizon, the fallen dusk, accompanied by the distant rumble of rolling thunder.
“Darn!” Tavia had the urge to kick the punctured tire, but reminded herself angrily the fetus in her belly.
She didn’t know what to do now. She wasn’t far from Alec’s house. She could walk, try to beat the storm. Besides, she didn’t know how to change a tire. Thus, her option was limited. Hence she decided to call her father as she took out the cellular phone she had carried in her purse.
Tavia punched in his number, but to her disappointment, there was no answer. Seeing no other practical choice, Tavia finally decided to walk, reasoning that was the quickest route home. She took her handbag, then locked the vehicle.
Though Tavia walked for several minutes, she already felt the pain in her abdomen. The cramps in her feet hurt terribly. Suddenly, a drizzle of raindrops fell on her forehead. Tavia’s heart panicked. She had to get to the house before it started to have a heavy downpour.
As Tavia quickened her pace, the rain got stronger and more intense than ever. With her whole body soaked, she scanned around to find a shelter. All around her was an empty road and both sides of the street were filled with trees. When Tavia saw an isolated building on the right, she approached it. Unfortunately, she slipped and fell onto the wet ground when she realized that she must have stepped on a stone.
Immediately, Tavia felt a sudden blade of fear knife through her. She could feel the warm liquid travel its way down her thighs. No! Her mind ran. Tavia struggled to stand up.
I’m going to be alright, she prayed. She was determined to fight against the impending storm. Tavia felt the droplet streaming down her face, but she wasn’t sure if those were her tears or the raindrops.
She felt helpless under the cruelty of the rain. She didn’t know how long she lay there. She only knew her body was a volcano of pain, nothing happened except the icy rain splattered on her face and her whole body.
Tavia was desperate. She prayed and yet nothing happened. Only the blood flowed from between her legs slowly and steadily like an eternal spring.
___
Raymond took another gulp from the Dutch bottle. Sense of sorts was returning to his mind.
“Why am I feeling betrayed and angry instead of relieved?”
Raymond felt as if he was going to be sick. He didn’t understand himself at all. He shook his head, denying it. It was ridiculous. He couldn’t and wouldn’t fall for his wife. They only lived with each other for only few months. They were bounded together by the marriage and their child. Not love.
Once again, reality seemed to fade away from him. This was a game he didn’t understand. Try as he might, he simply couldn’t grasp the punch line of his own hideous feeling.
“I love Rain. It’s impossible to love Tavia.” He muttered to himself.
A telephone was ringing somewhere at the edges of his confused mind… Tavia was leaving him… in the process; she would probably use him all this time. She had not just gotten the wrong end of the stick about what had happened and who was the responsible; she had become the stick … the stick that would beat him.
Raymond walked to the telephone in a trance. Dazed, he picked it up.
“Hello.” He said.
“Ray?”
“Dad, is that you?” he recognized his father’s voice immediately, but Tavia’s words were still ringing in his hears.
“Son, Tavia is in the hospital.” Raymond could hear the fretfulness in Rick’s voice.
His heart nearly dropped as his hand tightened around the phone. After a moment of stupor, Raymond immediately let go of the telephone and dashed out of a house.
___
Tears welled up in her eyes as she reminisced the last time Rain had met Raymond. Their ending, nevertheless, brought pain to her heart.
~~~
It was on her sister’s wedding day and Rain didn’t have the courage to face Raymond and Tavia. She was afraid that she will lose her sanity and break down. She didn’t want to ruin her sister’s wedding. But as Rain hid in the corner of the church, she saw Raymond scanning around the chapel. She wondered if it was she he was searching for.
She was nowhere in sight. Raymond tried to fight off the disappointment and regret as he watched the guests gather around waiting for the wedding ceremony to be started. Then, he saw her. They stared deeply and searchingly into each other's eyes for a second, until Rain broke the gaze and ran out of the church. Raymond chased after her.
When Rain couldn’t run anymore, she stopped abruptly and turned around. To Raymond, she looked the same, as beautiful as ever, yet her physique looked … different. Although she looked thinner, her abdomen had gotten larger. This shocked Raymond and he simply couldn’t think of any other rationality.
“Why are you avoiding me?”
The desolation in his voice went through Rain like a knife and left her aching. For him, for Tavia. And for herself. Besides, she didn’t deserve to be with Raymond. Rain thought dismally.
“What do you want me to do? You impregnated my sister Raymond.” Her voice was very soft but very steady. Her gazes were never wavered. A flicker of pain crossed his face before his expression settled once more into a stoic mask.
A muscle tightened in his jaw. “It was an accident, Rain. I never love Tavia.”
“You’re unbelievable. You’ve deceived me twice Raymond and I still fell for you. I’m such a fool.”
“Rain, I love you! I really do. You have got to believe me.”
“How can I believe you when the person you’re marrying to is not me?” Rain raised her voice, and Raymond was almost shocked to see such reaction.
Nonetheless, Raymond gazed at Rain longingly as he approached her. “We can run away. I love you Rain, I don’t want to lose you.”
Her heart softened at his words. They moved toward each other, and at last Rain was in his arms. She wrapped her arms around his neck and closed her eyes, letting the temporarily blissful moment seep into her heart.
“Rain, I’m so sorry… tell me you forgive me,” Raymond whispered into her ear, his voice earnest and pleading.
Tears flowed from her eyes as Rain looked into his. “I do,” she sobbed. Then their lips met in a deep, searing kiss.
When they ended the kiss, Rain wiped the tears as she stepped backward, away from Raymond.
“But I cannot do this to you, Raymond. You have to know the truth. You don’t deserve me.”
“What are you talking about?” He took a step forward. Was this some kind of act? But she didn’t look like she was joking. Moreover, her acting seemed so real that Raymond almost believed her. It was as if Rain was possessed by someone else or this wasn’t her.
If words were daggers Raymond would be bleeding. “I’m pregnant, can’t you see? I’m sorry for deceiving you all this time.”
Pregnant? What did she mean? How did this happen? Confusion clouded his mind as Raymond’s brain was bombarded with questions after questions at Rain’s admission.
“You lied! I could see it in your eyes.” Flabbergasted, Raymond could only utter those words in his confused state of mind.
Rain forced a smile at Raymond. “Raymond, don’t live life in denial. I know you can obviously see how big my belly is.”
Rain gave Raymond a final glance as she turned around and walked away, as the tears of shame and heartbrokenness trickled down her cheeks.
Raymond put his hands behind his head and wondered what had happened. Her words, for the first time, had sounded strangely empty. He was alone. The warmth and closeness had gone, as if the sun had slid behind a cloud, and the storm would come. A chill had descended. The fullest moment in his life had turned almost immediately into the emptiest.
“Who is he?” After Raymond recovered from the impact of her words, he yelled after her. But she never replied, never turned around, as if she had never loved him.
___
Looking intensely into the room through a small, square glass panel, Bosco’s heart pulverized devastatingly at the sight of Tavia. She lay quietly still and despite her eyes closed, he knew she was in sorrow. It made his blood boil in fury as he saw her pale face, her swollen lips, and her sunken eyes. Her health seemed to diminish the last time he had seen her.
And Bosco regretted for letting her walk out of his life. In fact he was infuriated at himself for not stopping Raymond and Tavia’s wedding. If only he stopped them from getting married, then none of these would happen. He can take care of Tavia and raise the child with her even if it wasn’t his own. Even if Tavia kept on insisting that she didn’t want to be with him.
Hearing the footsteps, Bosco turned his head sideway, expecting to see the bastard Raymond Lam. To his frustration, it was Alec Su, and Raymond’s parents.
“Where is he? His wife is in this condition and he’s nowhere to be found!” Bosco screamed angrily at them even though he was in no position to treat them that way.
However, he couldn’t control his emotion any longer. Bosco was on the verge of insanity and madness. Hours ago, he had deliberately driven on the street near Tavia’s new resident. If he hadn’t found Tavia lying cold and wet on the side of the road, she would have been dead. And the thought frightened him. He cannot acknowledge it.
They all ignored his uproar for they shamefully hadn’t gotten a clue of the whereabouts of Raymond. They all knew what had happened. A while ago, with a diffident look, the doctor had dejectedly informed them that Tavia had a miscarriage. She had lost too much blood.
Bosco turned back to stare into the room once again. He saw Raymond’s mother send Rick Lam a quick, instructing look, saw the husband nod almost imperceptibly, and a wave of sickness washed over him. Rick Lam left the hall and walked down the corridor while he took out his cell phone. He assumed that person that Rick Lam called was probably his son.
Seeing Tavia’s arousal, Bosco opened the door and entered the room, even without her father’s permission. Tavia opened her eyes but didn’t move.
She watched him with questions, and curiosity and confusion in her eyes. He wanted to explain what had happened to her but he didn’t know how. He didn’t know how she was going to react?
“Bosco, my baby, where’s my child?” She asked immediately when she saw him.
Seeing her blank and forlorn expression, Bosco did not know how to answer. He squeezed her hand, feeling the tension knotted in Tavia’s fingers as she gripped his tightly. “It’s … g- o - gone, Tavia.”
She stared at him as if he was speaking some foreign language, but somewhere deep in those brown eyes he saw the struggle.
“It’s not funny. I know you’re angry at me, Bosco.”
She was pleading him not to do this, to reveal that it was all some ghastly, perverse joke. And Tavia didn’t believe him, yet the image haunted her. She could still feel the streams of blood flowing out beneath her legs like a gurgle of an upturned jug.
“I’m sorry, Tavia.”
“No! I don’t want to hear your apology. I want my baby. I want to see my child.” Tavia went berserk as she pushed Bosco’s hand away as if it was some kind of disease. “Go away! I don’t want to hear your nonsense.”
A flood of tears poured from Tavia’s eyes, but somehow they were frozen tears accompanied by no facial expression, no sound at all.
Tavia turned over and pulled the pillow around her ears, trying to shut out the aching sound of reality and his apology, but even the muffled voice had the power to hurt her. She didn’t want to hear the truth, didn’t want to listen to whatever he was saying.
As if to highlight the fundamental nature of the change that had so suddenly and tragically occurred, Raymond came into the room.
___
Rain tried not to think of Raymond or recall their last encounter as she looked at the man beside her. Rain thought the more Ron talked the more she didn’t want to listen. She could never imagine how deeply she could loath someone. She had learned the values of redemption and forgiveness. Even now, she was still bitter with her mother’s death despite the fact that she had already forgiven Ruby. She was angry at Heaven for taking her mother away from her.
Now, the man kept apologizing to her. But she couldn’t make sense of what Ron was saying. The sounds of falling raindrops drowned out his words. She stared straight ahead through the window, trying not to flinch away from what she heard and saw even though the force of it was almost overwhelming.
Overhead the storm clouds were rolling. Veins of lightning lit the edges of the brew, momentarily lighting up the grim scene on the ground. Rain was taken aback by the extreme weather.
Rain staggered backward only to feel Ron’s hand on her shoulder. She jumped away from him when the telephone rang piercingly throughout the house. Rain quickly approached the phone for she assumed it would be Bosco. He was supposed to pick her up two hours ago. Moreover, Rain wanted to get away from the man. She feared him no matter how remorseful and apologetic he was.
Yet when Rain almost reached the receiver, it was too late. Bosco’s voice can be heard in the answering machine. “Rain, Tavia’s in an accident and I’m taking her to the hospital. I’ll call you back later.” Bosco said briefly and then he hung up.
Bosco’s utterance was brief and fast, Rain couldn’t understand what was going on. But she knew her heart pounded heavily against her chest. Instantly, Rain turned her attention toward Ron, and to her surprise, he was already at the door. She ran after him albeit she was pregnant.
Ron opened the door, her step heavier as Rain followed Ron outside. A gust of wind swirled around them, rustling trees and scattering dust. The air smelled soggy, heavy with the scent of chilly rain and storm clouds.
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Chandra
05/03/08
A Preview for Upcoming Chapters
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“Ron, please don’t leave me. I love you, I really do. I should have never taken you for granted.”
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“You miserable son of a bitch. She lost the baby because of you!” Bosco angrily yelled at him. “You don’t deserve to be here.”
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