| Fan Fiction |
by etoile
~*~
We had been inseparable after that chance meeting – Hoshi and Junsu, he used to call us – the Dynamic Duo. We were so different in so many ways – he used to cry at movies, I used to have the tissues at hand; he sang in the Choir, I couldn’t hold a tune to save my life; he excelled in the Arts, I shone in the Sciences. I couldn’t think of any two people who were more diverse, but whose personalities melded together the way ours did.
Every day after class, the first person I saw would be him, waiting in the corridor for me. Most days he would lean against the wall, reading a book or song scores. On others he would be looking over the railings and out into the great beyond, lost in his own thoughts. It didn’t matter what day it was, all I knew was that when Junsu was next to me, the sun shone brighter and the day seemed lighter. It was Chemistry, I told myself, the fact that we got on so well together. There was nothing more wonderful in this world than finding a person to laugh, cry and share my thoughts with. For me, Junsu was that person, and I was glad for the time we spent together.
Those were some times. Back then I was carefree and without worry. We would spend our days together, messing about like high school students do, and our nights too as we lay cuddled up in our duvets, whispering in the darkness over the phone until one of us drifted off to sleep. Whispering all our dreams and aspirations, our hopes and fears into those lifeless telephone receivers and breathing sweet life into our castles in the air, making them come alive. Even if Junsu would never become king or I would never learn how to fly, it was some sort of comfort knowing that at least in our hearts, and to each other, our most fervent desires lived.
I soon grew to love this boy for who he was – Junsu. I loved him from his head right down to his toes, and I wouldn’t trade him for the world. Did I love him in that way? I had no idea. In fact, I wondered whether I would ever have the courage to delve deeper inside myself and analyse these feelings growing within me, but I just chose to keep them bottled up. If I didn’t even know what they were, that must mean that they weren’t ready for anyone else yet.
I could sense that he felt the same way too, from his body language and the way he looked and smiled at me. “Because you’re the only person who knows what is in my heart,” was his hushed explanation. We had just passed the school gates and were making our way to get some lunch when I asked him whether he thought we would always be friends. To which he nodded and smiled, before declaring that I, Hoshiko Nakamura, would be the only person who ever knew him, Kim Junsu, inside out.
“And Kim Junsu is the only person who knows Hoshiko Nakamura inside out too,” I whispered back, a warm glow welling up in my heart. He only stuck his hands in his trouser pockets and turned to me, looking deep into my eyes. “Oh, really?” He smiled and caressed my cheek gently, a thoughtful expression on his face. “Hoshi, your spirit is like a deep and winding river. I think that even if I spent my whole life with you, I would never, never really know you inside out.”
I was taken aback. I didn’t know how to take those words. Did he mean that he thought I was putting on a front, or was that meant to be complimentary? He must have sensed my confusion, so he reached out and cupped my face with both his hands. “Don’t worry. That’s just another reason why we will never part.”
Maybe it was the summer heat. Maybe it was the feel of his warm hands on my cheeks, maybe it was because Junsu’s face was in such close proximity to mine—I don’t know. All I remember was that before I knew it, and more importantly before I could stop myself, the words were out.
“I love you…” I gulped, almost choking on the shock that I had said those words. “Chingu,” I added hurriedly. “I love you, chingu.”
I remember blushing five shades of red after that incident. Despite the fact I could feel my face slowly burning up, I tried to salvage the situation by feigning ignorance and rambling on like a complete fool, walking briskly ahead of Junsu so he wouldn’t see my embarrassment. He didn’t say a word, allowing my mindless chatter to dominate the conversation. Then suddenly, amidst my rambling, I heard his voice ring clear behind me.
“Saranghaeyo. Chingu.” (I love you, friend.)