| Fan Fiction |
by GreenHammock
I lay on my back, staring, half awake, up at the ceiling. It is late, I am groggy, but I do not want to sleep. Instead, I listen to the sounds of J as he nods off, head resting comfortably on my stomach. There are no sounds inside the confinement of my room, something I am both grateful and unsure of. To me, the entire world is currently at peace. For a moment, I even forget his head is there – simply listening to the whir of our lungs, breathing - until he stirs in his sleep, and pushes himself up onto his elbows.
I close my eyes, promptly, as he told me earlier that if I do not sleep, he was going to punish me. I feel his fingers wander over the beach of my forehead, approaching the sea that was my bed of hair, before becoming lost in the waves of my tresses. I hear him sigh – contently – and the pressure of his lips on my forehead.
“I want you to know one thing,” he whispers, “if you think it long and mad, the wind of banners that passes through my life, and you decide to leave me on the shore of the heart where I have roots,” There is sadness in his voice – if I were not pretending to be asleep, I would open my eyes, and ask him why he sounded so sad – at least, to see him as he spoke. “Remember, that on that day, at that hour,” there is a long pause. I wonder if he knows what he is going to say. Sometimes, while I previously pretended to sleep, J would talk to me – talk to me, but never say anything. He finally speaks, “I shall lift my arms, and my roots will set off to seek another land.”
His other hand touches the side of my face, gently, careful not to wake me. “But if even the tiniest bit of you remembers me,” he continues, sniffing. “if even the tiniest piece of you continues to think of me, then I will refuse to forget you.”
“And if each day, each hour, you feel that you are destined for me – with implacable sweetness – if each day a flower,” he pauses, his thumb brushing over my lips. “Climbs up your lips to seek me – ah my love, ah my own – in me all the fire is repeated, in me nothing is extinguished or forgotten.”
J stops for a moment as I mulled over the words, and J, no doubt, compiled his thoughts. Suddenly, his hands leave my face, and I hear him move away from me.
“My love,” he speaks, again, his voice gentle and sincere “feeds on your love, beloved – and as long as you live it will be in your arms, without leaving mine.”
And then, there is silence. The silence expands for a very long time, until I am certain J is gone. Cautiously, just to be sure, I roll myself in the direction I think he went, knowing that if he were still here, he would not be far away. I don’t bump in to anything, but wait a few minutes regardless. I hear nothing. Suddenly sure of myself, I peak open one eye, only to find no one there. I sit up, stretch, and look around.
I freeze.
J smiles at me from the corner of the room, where his legs dangle from the extended table that comes out from the wall. I swallow hard, open my mouth to speak, when J steps down and claps his hands.
“Good actress,” he says, smugly. “But I knew you were awake.”
“But J, I have just awoken”- I try to lie, but J cane easily read me. He chuckles.
“You know what I said would happen if you didn’t sleep” – he takes a slow step forward – “It’s punishment time.”
He lunges at me. I yelp and scamper off in the opposite direction, but J grabs me at my waist and pulls me back. I squeal and flail, but it is only moments until I am pulled against his chest, and he is kissing the side of my face. We laugh together, and he attacks my face, no inch left untouched, but I do not mind.
I am punished with affection.
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14.07.09.