| Fan Fiction |
by mushiromigal
Title: 9/10
The tile is great! It gives the reader a hint of what will happen next since goodbye will be something like leaving, or death, etc. However, perhaps ‘Goodbye Forever’ will have a stronger emotion since this will be closer to the idea of ‘death’.
Poster: NA/5
I didn’t grade this since you didn’t have a poster.
Background: 5/5
The common yet useful black and white combination allows the reader to read the story easily. =]
Forewords: 9/10
I like your forewords as it gives a general idea of what the story is about. However, it’ll be better if you introduce the characters.
Plot: 8/10
Your plot was great, the pace was alright, and it was realistic. Although it was quite clear what you’re going to write, it’s still nice. I like the quote at the very end; perhaps you could add it into the real story?
Spelling/Grammar/Vocabulary: 13/15
You didn’t do badly on this. There are quite a lot of errors, but I could tell that it’s mostly typos. They are mostly caused by the laziness to press the ‘shift’ key. Furthermore, it would be better not to use ‘…’ too often, when it can be easily replaced by a comma. The characters’ names should also be capitalized.
Creativity: 13/15
Although quite a number of stories wrote about the female lead having cancer or other fatal diseases, yours is quite unique, since the female lead died, and you mostly wrote about the pain and suffering for the female lead. Well done! C=
Writing style: 4/5
As the story is written in mostly script format, there is a lack description of the characters' emotions and the surroundings. But it’s a good effort, since it’s not completely in script format, and there is some description, although it’s not much.
Reader friendly: 5/5
You’re very nice to all the readers, and you reply to them. :)
(I’m not sure if that’s what Reader Friendly means, but in this case, it means friendly to readers. ) =]
Characters: 5/5
Although Hebe+Arron pairing is very common, I must say, they’re very popular, and possibly a good match.
Flow of story: 10/10
The flow of the story is just right, not much I can pick on. :)
Bonus: 5/5
The bonus is full since you’re the first one who requested for me, and for three reviews at a time! I liked your story too. :)
Total score: 86/95 ( 90.5/100)
Continue to strive and improve consistently on your works! Good luck! I hope you like my review :)
Thanks!!!^^angelheartED from http://charming-elegance.co.nr/