Always by your side
by Suki Chan
Chapter 18
They turned around and saw Danny.
Danny was standing by the stairway, holding two umbrellas in his hand. He found out it was raining, so he immediately ran down with the umbrellas to give to Matt and Olivia.
The two people he cared the most.
Matt and Olivia were shocked, “…Danny.”
Danny looked confused and stunned and angry, “Why…Matty and Olive???”
“…Danny.” They felt guilty at him.
“Matty said Danny likes Olive. Danny can tell Olive and hold Olive’s hand and kiss Olive.” Danny restlessly shook his head and rubbed his hands, “Why Matty’s kissing Olive now…”
Matt and Olivia wordlessly looked at him.
“Danny likes Olive…” Danny finally confessed to Olivia, but it was too late.
“I’m so sorry Danny.” Olivia approached him softly, “You’re so kind and caring to me. I can feel it. But the person whom I like is Matt. He’s the one I want to stay and build a close relationship with. Danny, you are my good friend. We can still buddy-buddy around. And you’re Matt’s brother, so I’ll treat you like my own brother too!”
Danny felt very very bad. He could hardly breathe. Olivia’s words were like a knife stabbing into his chest. Very heavy, very painful…just very bad. A sourness rose in his nose tip and his eyes turned red and burning hot. He did not know if this was called jealousy or what. He did not like this feeling. It made him very uncomfortable. He did not like it.
Matt instantly held Danny’s arms and comforted, “Listen Danny. Matty knows you like Olivia…but…I can’t suppress my feeling…I like her too. Matty and Olivia want to be together. It’s hard on you Danny. Matty knows it. But you want Matty to be happy too, don’t you?”
“…Danny likes Olive. But Olive doesn’t like Danny. Olive only likes Matty.” Danny dropped down his head, “Olive doesn’t like Danny…no one likes Danny…because Danny is dumb; Danny is a retard.”
“No that’s not true, Danny!” Matt was horrified, “Matty loves you. Matty always loves you!”
It was too difficult for Danny to take this. He did not understand. He scrunched his face and yelled, “Matty’s big liar!”
“So sorry Danny!” Matt panicked, “Forgive me Danny!”
Tears rolled down Danny’s face. He felt betrayed and cheated by his beloved brother, “Matty’s a big liar! Danny hates you! Danny hates you!” He bursted out a big cry.
“No Danny!” Matt was heartbroken to hear this from Danny. He anxiously grasped Danny’s shoulder and wanted to calm him down.
Danny struggled and flung Matt away. He threw down the umbrellas and ran away.
“…Danny!” Matt fell on the ground from Danny’s unruly forceful push. He moaned and struggled to crawl up in the heavy rain.
“Matt are you ok?!” Olivia immediately carried him up and opened an umbrella to cover Matt and herself. They were already wet head to toe.
“Where’s Danny?!” Matt screamed and spun around. Danny had already dashed down the street and there was no trace of him.
Olivia was so worried too, “Don’t know!”
“Gosh and it’s pouring rain and he ran away without an umbrella!” Matt helplessly stomped, “Where is he now?! Where could he go?!”
“Let’s go find him!” Olivia said.
The two held tightly to their umbrellas under the wind and heavy rain. They walked around the block, down the streets, around the corners, at the back alleys...to search for Danny. The streets were quiet in this late night and poor weather. They kept walking and walking…and did not know how far they had gone, but still they could not find the missing boy.
Rain had stopped. It was dusk and the dark sky began to turn bright.
They had been searching for a few hours. Olivia’s legs were tired and numb. Her steps were slowing down.
She frowned and bent down to pound her thighs. Matt obviously did not feel tired, he did not feel anything at all. At this moment, all he had in his mind was to find Danny.
Olivia sighed and quickened her steps to catch up on Matt.
They went to a park. A few early birds were there for their morning exercises.
“…where’s Danny…” Matt mumbled. He dreadfully dropped onto a bench and bewildered.
“…don’t worry. Danny will be ok.” Olivia did her best to comfort Matt, though she knew it would not help much, “You must be really tired. Let’s rest for a bit and go find him again.”
Matt leaned back and covered his face in his palms. He was exhausted.
Olivia gently patted his lap.
“Danny…gotta be ok…gotta be ok…” Matt breathed heavily and began to sob.
“Matt.” Olivia sadly hugged his head. She understood how important Danny was to Matt. Danny must be ok. Must be. Otherwise, she did not know what can happen to Matt.
“…where could he go?” Matt shook his head, “He doesn’t have any friend. He never goes on the street alone. It was so heavy rain and late at night. He must be so angry but when he ran away he must be really scared in the dark by himself! For God’s sake…where is he…how can I find him…”
“Calm down first, Matt. You must calm down to think clearly.” Olivia looked at him firmly as support, “Where does Danny like to go? Where do you usually bring him…say after work and on the weekends? For example…beach, or park, or do sports…”
“Sports?!” Matt thought and suddenly jumped up, “Basketball court! The outdoor basketball court at the community center! We go there all the times! Danny loves the place! It’s a block from here!”
“Then let’s go and check now!” Olivia suggested.
They rushed to the basketball court. It was early morning and the ground was soggy after last night’s rain, so the place was entirely empty. There seemed to be nobody around.
Finally, at the far corner on the top row of the bleaches, they spotted someone sitting there. They instantly ran up.
“…Danny!” They called at the same time.
Danny squirmed at the corner. The bleaches were not covered and he must be under the rain the whole night. He was wet from head to toe, and water was still dripping down his hair. He was shivering and bewildering.
“Thank God we found you!” Matt saw Danny’s condition and stunned, “Oh gosh…are you ok?” Without thinking, Matt took off his only t-shirt and covered it on Danny. He wiped Danny’s hair and patted him dry here and there.
“Are you ok Danny?” Olivia felt relieved to have found him. She turned to the topless Matt caringly, “Matt, watch-out you’ll catch a cold like this! Put your t-shirt back on!”
Matt did not care about himself. His concentration was only on Danny, “You just ran away like that last night. Scared me to death! Danny you…” Matt touched Danny’s face to make sure he was ok.
Danny shrunk his body and looked away from them.
Matt tried to touch his face again, “Come on, let Matty take a look at you. You got all wet from the rain and hope you didn’t get sick huh?”
Danny restlessly curled to one side and did not look at Matt. He kept shivering, not sure he was sick or scared.
“…Danny are you ok?” Matt was bothered by Danny’s reaction, “Tell Matty!”
Danny did not answer.
The nightmare from 7 years ago hit Matt’s head once again. 7 years ago, when Danny was abandoned by his adopted parents, he was deeply hurt, he lost trust in people, he did not talk, he wanted to hide.
The way he acts now is exactly a replicate.
“No Danny…no…” Matt was despondent, “Don’t do this to yourself again…please…no…”
****************************
“Dr. Wong, I’m worried. I can’t even sleep for the past 3 days.” Matt sat in the room alone with Dr. Wong at his clinic, “Danny’s acting exactly like he did 7 years ago. Ever since that day we found him at the basketball court, in the last 3 days he hasn’t said a word and he barely eats anything. He wakes up a couple times at sleep from nightmare.”
“It looks like the incident has caused big impact to his emotion. His psychological condition is definitely unstable at this moment.” Dr. Wong heard the story from Matt and analyzed, “It’s likely that he feels betrayed. He’s deeply hurt.”
“I know. I’ve hurt him so badly.” Matt was about to cry, “He’s trying to hide himself once again, like how he did 7 years ago. At least back then he could still rely on me, he could still trust me. But this time, I’m afraid it’s much worst. He feels I cheated on him. He can’t rely and trust me anymore. He thinks there’s no one else in the world who’s by his side. Last time after abandoned by his adopted parents, he didn’t say one single word for 6 whole months! And now this time…what’s going to happen to him? Will he recover? I’m scared. I’m very scared Dr. Wong.”
Dr. Wong comforted Matt in a firm professional tone, “Don’t worry. Let me do a check-up on Danny first. I will have a good talk with him.”
“Thank you. Thank you very much, Dr. Wong.” Matt stood up and sincerely thanked the doctor.
Matt opened the door. Danny was emotionlessly waiting outside.
“Danny.” Matt went to him.
He did not respond nor even look at his brother. He just stared in the air.
“It’s ok that you get mad at me. It’s ok that you don’t want to talk to me.” Matt said softly, “But you have to go in to see Dr. Wong. Whatever’s struck in your mind, you must tell Dr. Wong. Ok Danny?”
Danny did not move.
“Be good huh?” Matt wanted to pat Danny’s head, but he instantly shifted his body away.
The nurse and the receptionist saw this and felt very surprised. Since the first time Danny came to this clinic, Matt was persistently by his side. The two brothers were always intimate and close, as if they never quarrelled or parted.
“Everything ok, Matt?” The nurse and the receptionist were worried. It was too unusual.
“…hm.” Matt squeezed out a bitter smile. He softly pulled Danny’s arm, “Alright let’s go in to see Dr. Wong now.”
Danny whined and refused to go.
“Come on Danny…” Matt pulled a bit harder. The nurse paced over to help.
Dr. Wong heard the conversation and came out too, “Danny’s a good boy and always listens to Dr. Wong, right? Let’s go in a have a chat, okie? And I’ve got a new game for you today! Wow aren’t you excited?”
The professional’s words were persuasive. Danny finally softened up and followed Dr. Wong.
“Good boy, Danny.” Matt said from behind, “Matty’s going to pee first and will come back very soon. Will wait for you here, ok?”
Danny and Dr. Wong went into the room.
“Can I have the washroom key?” Matt asked the receptionist. Suddenly he remembered he did not have much cash left in his wallet. He’d better go get some money in order to pay for the treatment fee, “Sorry later. I’ll be back soon.”
Matt left the clinic.Before walking into Dr. Wong’s office, Danny turned around and had a glance at Matt. He wanted to say sorry to Matty. He really isn’t mad at him. He didn’t mean to yell at him. He’s not happy; he feels a big stone struck in his heart. But he doesn’t hate Matty.
He still loves Matty.
But Matt was talking to the receptionist and had his back at Danny. Matt did not see the expression on Danny’s face.
Danny did not know how to express his feelings. He did not know how to say it out.
“…come in Danny.” Dr. Wong called.
So Danny followed Dr. Wong and went into his room. Dr. Wong shut the door.
Matt changed his mind and went to get some money first.
There was a long line up at the bank machine. Matt stood at the end of the line with ten people ahead of him. The old couple at the machine seemed to have some trouble with whatever they were doing. They kept nagging and trying over and over again.
“...gee.” Matt mumbled to himself, though he was always a patient person. Dr. Wong needed to have a longer talk with Danny today, so Matt had plenty of time to wait.
There was siren coming from far to near. Matt spun around but did not see anything. He wondered what was happening.
As Matt headed back to the clinic, he saw crowds of people on the street. More and more people started jamming here and there. They pointed and commented.
“Wow I can smell the smoke from here! Must be bad…” A bunch of women stuck their heads together and discussed.
Matt walked by them and asked curiously, “What’s wrong?”
“Charles Building is on fire!” The women agitatedly pointed, “People are screaming and running down from the building! Fire trucks and ambulances are here! Must be pretty severe ‘cause there’re quite a few of them! Wait…see there’s another one coming! Gosh…”
Charles Building!!! That’s where Dr. Wong’s clinic is!!!
Danny is there!!!