| Fan Fiction |
by Suki Chan
Wallace’s lips turned stronger and pressed firmly on hers.
It was an affection of being adored and needed. Sabrina’s mind blanked out.
Time went by silently. Their lips slowly parted.
Wallace stroked Sabrina’s face. Her cheeks were flushy red.
“…I am sorry. I should have asked you first…before I kiss you.” Wallace uttered, “You’re beautiful, Sabrina. You’re too lovely.”
The words of Wallace shocked Sabrina. Her mind woke up instantly. She shifted her body and sat up.
Wallace did not notice the odd expression on Sabrina’s face. He dropped down his head and caressed her fingers.
“…it’s getting late.” Sabrina cleared her voice, “I should go back now.”
Wallace understood the strict rule of the convent that Sabrina must return before sunset. “I will walk you back.”
Both were speechless while walking along the trail. Wallace softly held Sabrina’s hand and peeked at her once in a while. The sweet smile never faded away on his face. Sabrina squeezed out some smiles to Wallace in return.
“Goodnight, Sabrina.” Wallace reluctantly sent her off at the door of the convent. He whispered, “Don’t miss me too much, but a bit is fine. Huh?”
She walked in, but suddenly turned back and looked at Wallace.
Wallace smiled and waved.
“Goodbye, Wallace.” Sabrina gave another glance at him and shut the door.
*****************************
The next Saturday at noon, as usual, Wallace stood at the yard of the convent to wait for Sabrina.
Sabrina did not show up.
Wallace thought she was busy with something. He patiently waited. But almost an hour passed by and still he did not see Sabrina. He turned worried.
A nun approached him, “Young man.”
Wallace looked at her with confusion.
“Please don’t wait here anymore for Sabrina.” The nun said, “She had moved out already.”
“Moved out? To where?” Wallace was shocked.
“She left a few days ago.” The nun said calmly, “She did not tell us where she’s going. She only told us that if you ever come to find her, she wants us to tell you…don’t wait for her. Forget her…don’t wait for her.”
Wallace panicked, “Why did she say such thing? What happened? No! She must have at least said something about it. Where can she be?”
“We really don’t know.” The nun sighed, “This is Sabrina’s decision. God will have His arrangements on her.”
“She left again without leaving a word behind?” Wallace bewildered.
“Take care, young man.” The nun walked away.
“Why?” Wallace stared around in the air, “Sabrina, what’s happening? Last week we still had a happy time together! Something goes wrong? What goes wrong? Where are you? Where are you?”
Wallace uttered painfully. This was the second time that Sabrina left without telling him. The first time was sudden, but he understood. But this second time…Wallace never expected this second time to happen…not now. He thought, since last Sunday, something had built up between him and Sabrina.
He cannot simply let her go like last time anymore. He cannot lose her now.
There was deadly silence at the yard.
Finally, Wallace knew it was meaningless to stay. He sighed deeply and wobbled away.
“We are not supposed to lie. It’s sinful.” The nun stood by the door of the room.
From the window, Sabrina spotted Wallace dragging his heavy steps and left. She softly put down the corner of the curtain.
“I don’t know if I’ve done the right thing or not,” The nun came in, “to lie to him that you have left.”
Sabrina sighed.
“So you have decided not to see him ever again.” The nun looked at Sabrina.
The loving words of Wallace softly floated in Sabrina’s mind. It all sounded familiar. Her every guy once said the same to her. But, at the end, she was left with nothing, but pain in her heart.
Sabrina closed her eyes and slowly shook her head.
**********************************
Inside the solemn cathedral, Sabrina sat there alone and tried to concentrate on reading the Bible under the dim sunlight sliding through the classical stain glasses.
Her mind was restless. She knew it was not appropriate. She quickly looked up the statue of Jesus Christ at the center of the sanctuary and drew a cross over her chest.
She sighed and closed her eyes to pray.
“Sabrina.” A man’s voice softly called.
No.
“Sabrina.” There was the voice again.
She abruptly turned around and was stunned, “…you…you’re not allowed to come in here!”
“I…” Wallace approached.
“Before anyone sees you…” Sabrina freaked out and spun around, “you must get out…” She tried to drag the man away from this sacred place of the convent.
Wallace insisted, “Sabrina, I want to talk to you…”
“You’ll get into big trouble…” Sabrina struggled.
“I let him in, Sabrina.” An elderly nun walked in.
“Sister Rosanna?” Sabrina looked at her; she was the supervisor of this convent. She was also the person who let Sabrina live here.
“You stay in the sanctuary everyday, from dust to dawn. You read the Bible and pray. But your mind isn’t peaceful. God’s words do not go into your head at all. Your heart is not with God. You are only hiding.” Sister Rosanna said.
Sister Rosanna spoke into Sabrina’s heart. Sabrina felt guilty.
“I’m sure Sister Maria is watching you from Heaven.” Sister Rosanna softly patted Sabrina’s arm, “She doesn’t want to see you being so painful, and bluntly make any decision that will make you regret for the rest of your life.”
Hearing of her beloved Sister Maria, tears immediately formed in Sabrina’s eyes.
“It’s time for you to affirm yourself.” Sister Rosanna grasped her hand, “Have a good talk with him. Then ask yourself again, whether this place is still for you.”
“Sister.” Sabrina bit her lips. She was lost.
“Be brave, my girl.” Sister Rosanna gave the utmost support, “God shall be with you. Our door is forever opened for you.”
Sabrina sighed and nodded.
********************************
They went to the beach side. They sat down on the sand and sheltered by a big rock.
“Sabrina, are you cold?” Wallace was caring.
“Wallace…please…don’t be so nice to me.” Sabrina faltered.
“Why?” Wallace did not understand, “What’s happening?”
Sabrina bit her lips.
“Sabrina, why are you hiding from me?” Wallace asked sadly.
“I’m not hiding from anyone.” Sabrina said calmly.
“Yes you are.”
“I’m sorry if I have given you any…wrong impression.” Sabrina looked away, “We are just friends, Wallace. Just friends. There’s nothing else between us. Not in the past, not now, and not in the future.”
Wallace did not believe it, “Look at me, Sabrina.”
She refused.
He softly grabbed her shoulder and turned her towards him, “I know you share the same feelings as I do. I know.”
Sabrina dreadfully shook her head.
Wallace softly touched her cheeks and whispered, “Please accept me, Sabrina.”
“I am…scared…” Sabrina wrapped her arms around her knee and curled her body.
“Sabrina.” He was worried.
“I don’t want to get hurt again…I am scared…” She trembled and buried her face.
“I won’t hurt you, Sabrina.” Wallace patted her head, “Trust me.”
“No…one day…you will get tired of me…you will leave me…” She began to sob.
Sabrina was like an injured little innocent animal. Wallace’s heart melted; he was keen to protect her, “I won’t, Sabrina. I promise.” He hugged her tight.
“You will…when you find out about my past…you will scorn me…you will leave…” Sabrina breathed heavily, “Before it gets too late, before we move any further, before…both you and I get hurt. We should…just end at this point. Wallace, you are a very, very good guy. You deserve a much better woman, not me.”
Wallace finally understood, “You mean your past with Andrew? I know it all. It’s history, Sabrina. I was married too! Let us forget it all and look into the future together.” He said firmly.
Sabrina sighed and stared at the water, “Wallace, don’t make your promise that easily. You don’t know about me. You don’t know what kind of a person I am.”
“Don’t look down on yourself.” Wallace grasped her hands, “Yes, you might have done some wrong things. You stepped between a couple’s marriage. Yes…that’s very wrong. But you aren’t as bad as how other people might think. After all, you aren’t all for money. I can tell. I can tell from what you did for Andrew Ho.”
The memory once again stirred the ripples in Sabrina’s heart.
“You loved Andrew. You lost him. You committed suicide for him. You have a devoting and fragile heart. This is the true side of Sabrina I see.” Wallace was the only one knowing this secret.
Meant to be.
Sabrina withdrew from his hands, “No…”
Wallace begged, “Sabrina, I want to be with you! You are too lovely…”
His words were like a spell to Sabrina. She suddenly got agitated and stood up, “Don’t say that to me! I don’t want to hear that ever ever again!” She turned around and ran.
“Sabrina!”
She blindly ran away from the beach with tears flooding down her face. She did not want to think. She only wanted to escape.
A dashing car was approaching.