| Fan Fiction |
by whitefoxbuns
------------------
“Seungri?”
What was that I heard, a female voice tugging my name? Changmin hyung somehow
spilled his drinks all over the trash bin; I didn’t know he was that clumsy. My shoulder
signaled a tap, turning around I could feel the heat from my face disappeared. I knew it
was drained out of color.
I didn’t think I was breathing until I realize who was beside Ji Yong. My eyes
dumbstruck, unstuck themselves from the glued sight of Sun Ye noona…who was
hanging off the side of his arm, face wore the same expression as mine.
I swallowed a lump rising up my throat. My eyes casted down staring intently at the
invisible face of that woman reflected off the marble pavement. My helpless saliva
couldn’t do its job in coating my dry throat. I could not speak nor did I want to. It was
then that a hand held my elbow lightly with a soft pressure that brought me back to
reality settling my spinning head. I was thankful for Changmin’s presence. It was him
who spoke first, pushing back the tension that was suffocating me.
“Hi hyung.” he nodded to Ji Yong. I could see his head out of the corner of my eyes.
“Changminimnida” he addressed to Sun Ye, with a gentleman like gesture stuck his
hand out to her.
“Yeh…Sun Yenimnida” She took his hand and lower her head in greeting.
During those umpteenth moments of seconds, I debated with my startling mind.
Should I or shouldn’t I…Lifting my head I returned my look to Ji Yong, and fake a
smile.
“Hyung, did you both have a nice time?” I allowed a pushed chuckle to escape my lips;
hopefully it would do its job in hiding my emotions.
“What are you two doing here?” He didn’t answer. These words sounded like a slap to
my face.
I snuck a glance at Sun Ye, who was half surprise and maybe…a little jealous? that all
Ji Yong cared was the reason I was here. Ji Yong repeated the question; tone seems
to be more urgent and rough.
I was about to give in and let myself response to his statement. Actually a mere
seconds more and the insults, the screams, would slip out of my lips…
If it wasn’t for Changmin’s answer in place of mine, I would’ve regretted letting myself
breakdown in front of them both.
“Hyung!...We’re here for the movie. I’m just taking maknae out for a break, some fresh
air you know?...I see you are doing the same to this nice girl of yours.” Changmin
didn’t meant it…but I knew him using the nickname “maknae” was a sting to Ji Yong. A
word of affection did its work well.
There was a silent…a brief one…waited after Changmin response. Like a staring
contest it went on until someone gave up. Ji Yong versus Changmin…I guessed…me
verse the floor…again.
A nervous female giggle poked the tight bubble that was eventually going to pop.
“How about joining us for dinner? Right…Ji? It would be great.” She smiles
enthusiastically while those playful fingers of her rubbed Ji Yong’s arms up and down. I
could feel jealousy burning my cheeks.
“ummm…I don’t think we could.” Changmin replied with a fake sympathy “I think this
little one gotta get home. He is tired.” I was surprised when the sensation of his fingers
pulling my wrist toward his side.
I looked up to see Changmin smiling eyes signaling a message only I would know.
“Yeah he’s right” I retorted eyes lingered on Changmin a little then turned to them with
a smile.
“I hope you guys have a good time.” And with that Changmin pulled my willing body out
toward the exit.
As soon as a cold air hit my face, the stings felt so good against my swelling eyes. I
wanted to cry but instead laughed into the air. The breath playfully came out in puffs.
In the dark, I was numb and for the moment I was free to release what was held inside.
My stupid laughing phase was interrupted by Changmin snicker. I turned to him in
curiosity.
“You finish now.” He asked with a mocking expression, face cold and expressionless.
His stare went right through me, like it was searching, shuffling my inside with just a
look. He sighed and turned his gaze away.
Nothing could describe how stunned I was, or even how scared and afraid that
Changmin, this person, this stranger…this companion had found me out. My emotion
was now scraped dirt obvious to Changmin knowledge.
“Let’s go…” He stated, hands in pockets, heading toward the parked Mercedes. I
gaped at his retreating back. His silhouette stirred a temptation in me. I followed,
hastily catching up with his long strides.
“Where are we going? Home? ” I called out to him but got no response. My breath
came short when I came up to the car. Changmin standing on the passenger side,
held the door open with a confused expression. Was he upset?
“Where are we going?” I repeated with stressed syllables, getting irritated at his
sudden silence. I stood there for a minute, debating whether to step in or not. How else
am I going to get home? It’s too late to catch a bus, but then Changmin would never
let me out of his grasp to even get on one.
He still was completely mute as if the event we faced earlier had hit him harder than it
hit me. I gave up; sliding into the freezing car. My hairs stood up as it came into
contact with the icy leather.
I jumped when he closed the door with a loud ‘BAM’. Sliding into the driver’s seat he
muttered out few words that sounded like “seat belt.” Completely ignored him, as if he
never said the words, I turned to the window and gaze outside. In an instant his large
form hover onto my side, pulling at my seat belt and secured it harshly around my
body.
I sat still and tense through the whole ride. The car was silent except for the light
whoosh and bumps along the road with an occasional sighs I released while staring
straight ahead.
-----
For a while, the subtle dark vision was luring me to sleep. Yes I was tense, but I was
also tired and upset. I want nothing else than to curl under my blanket and pretend that
the night didn’t exist. I didn’t exist. Ji Yong didn’t exist. It was warmer now, with the
heater blowing softly through the vent. I blinked a few times trying to stay awake. As
long as I was conscious enough, maybe Changmin wouldn’t kidnap me.
“What do you want to eat?”
“Huh?…” I thought I was dreaming
“Are you hungry?” So I really wasn’t dreaming. Changmin was asking me in a low
tone; his eyes still focused on the road.
“no” I mumbled refusing to be here any longer.
“I-” As if my stomach has a mind of its own, it interrupted me with an embarrassing
roar. I cursed myself for not finishing that popcorn earlier.
“That is a yes.” He retorted, switching lane with flashing signal, and swerving the car
into a deserted restaurant. I looked at him in disbelief. I didn’t move as Changmin
stepped out the car, strolled to my side then open the door. He gestured with his hand
“ka ja” *let’s go*
Contemplating, I fidget from the thought of sleeping with no food in my stomach. The
sound, the feel, the situation won’t be pleasant. So I agreed to spend a little more time
just to eat.
-----
The ringing of the bell, stirs the warm atmosphere of the restaurant. Freshly baked
food, floating with the aroma of warm heat, washed over my body. Unconsciously my
legs were being seduced by the tempting surrounding. It wasn’t crowded just enough
people to make a customer’s appetite drool. I headed to the men’s room, making sure
I was loud enough for Changmin to notice my disappearance.
The restroom door was really heavy, as if it was glued to the metal bar holding it
against the wall. I suddenly felt weak in my attempt to push it open.
No one was inside. I felt relieved. My ears could make a familiar Christmas tune hung
in the air, playing softly through the radio. I recognized the singers and smiled at the
image that appeared… Gummy noona
I stuck my hands under the lukewarm water, affectionately letting it soaked through my
skin, under my nails, stinging the pores from the cold skin approaching by the heat. I
stared at my reflection. The Seungri inside, looked too pale and too miserable to be
me. His hair was wild, dark locks snuck out below his neck. His eyes were dim and
empty hugged by glowed bruises under the bright beam of the room.
I covered those eyes with my now hot fingers. I stirred at the sensation it created. A
warm numb spread from those orbs to my now lively cheeks, wet traces freshen my dry
skin.
They were out of paper towel so I wiped my wetness on my jeans, using a bit of my
sleeves to dry my face.
Outside, I found Changmin sitting crossed legs at a table, snuck cozily at the corner.
He was sipping some beverage and staring off in space. There were two bowls,
baring its sweet nutrition to the naked eyes, supple steams drifting off of it. My nostrils
could sense the taste from where I stood.
U-dong noodles…
I could feel the saliva beginning to gather in my throat as I sat down. Wetting my lips I
prepared to taste the hot substance; my taste buds were to swim in heaven. Changmin
started eating too. Sensing the mood, he kept quiet until I finished.
“Can I have another one?” He ordered eyes still on his bowl, mouth stuffed with food.
“Weh? I’m really full. I can’t eat more. I—”
“It’s not for you.” He mumbled and my face was flushed from embarrassment.
Changmin ate so much, slurping every moment the spoon came in contact with his
mouth. Once in a while he stopped to take a breath and the dove back into the tasty
liquid.
Watching him built an irritation in me. I couldn’t continue to watch a person who was
eating like a pig.
“Can I drink?”
“I don’t know can you?” With a witty tone dripping with sarcasm, he answered. I
decided not to ask, and ordered myself.
“Ahjushi! Ajushi!!”
“shshhhh!!!” Changmin scolded, eyes glaring. I glared at him and yelled louder.
“AHJUSHI!!”
“Yeh…yeh…what do you want?” an old man with wrinkly smiling eyes, came to our
table. He wore an oversized red cover with trembling fingers while taking down my
order.
“Ahjushi…may I please have two bottles of soju?”
Changmin looked like he was choking when he caught what I had wanted. He failed to
make a decent statement when he tried to speak with a clogged up mouth.
The old man cringes his eyes, scanned me up and down. “One coming up” he shouted
while walking away mumbling incoherent words.
“You are underage!” Changmin spat out under his breath, trying to not call attention
with his lousy suspicious voice.
“Do you even know what soju taste like?”
I shrugged. It can’t be that bad I told him. Inside I knew too well, how people blackout
from alcohol, how horrible the headache will be, and how it was the best to forget pain.
If only for a moment…my inside could numb.
“Enjoy” the old man settled two bottles onto the wooden surface, then knowingly
handed me one cup… “good luck” he mumbled again
“pshhch…what the heck is he talking about?..” I faked staring at the empty cup and
bottles.
“You gonna drink all that?” Changmin asked skeptically. He took one of the bottles
standing on his side of the table. Pop the top off and took a sip, he released a
satisfactory groan from the deep of his throat.
I swallowed as his Adam’s apple bobble up and down.
I choose to forget the cup. Nudging the helpless ceramic aside, I tried the same
method to pop a bottle like Changmin, hoping it wouldn’t fly off and hit someone. I
chuckled at my achievement when the cap finally came off.
“Aja!Aja!” I urged the bottle high up, addressing to the jerk gaping in front of me. He
neither looks surprised or disappointed; maybe there was a little amusement as he
raised one eye brow and smirked at me.
I gulped and decided that this burning acid was what I needed for the night. It creeps
down my throat leaving trails of burning throat flesh inside. My eyes swell up as the
bitterness begins to destroy my taste buds. Squeezing my eyes shut refraining from
weeping I tried to think of the image of Changmin laughing at me.
“Ah….” Was what I could manage after a few minutes trying to coat my tongue with my
saliva erasing the taste of soju.
“That was good.” I smiled truthfully for the first time of the night. Changmin sat quietly,
with no replies, watching my actions with his calm eyes. I could sense he was about to
say something but stop. I didn’t want to ask him. So…I reached for the green bottle
again, this time anticipating the burning sensation to make it down further into my
body. Maybe the alcohol would evaporate to my brain and drug it for tonight. Maybe…I
hope it does though… as I smile bitterly into the drink.
-----------
“You look funny” I blurted out at the smudged figure in front of me, taking the
umpteenths cup or something…I lost count again.
“You are too drunk…” the man said. Who is he talking to? Why is he coming toward
me?
“Don’t touch me!” I fling my arm at him, who was trying to somewhat move me off of my
position on the floor. Why am I on the floor?
“Let’s go maknae…I am in big trouble” I heared bees buzzing in my ears. My head
swayed in circle I couldn’t make out the stranger. My eyes were burned from the bright
light on the ceiling.
“Nmm…no….hme” I’m suffocating as if someone was smothering me. I tried to push
my chest but it doesn’t move. My stomach felt like it was about to spit out my guts. I
don’t feel good….
Then…
Something warm, wet and sticky gushed out of my throat. My eyes were swelling with
water, heading pounding with pain…I mumbled while aiming for the floor.
My visions blurred and the only thing I could make out was Changmin’s worried face
surrounded with a dark hazy air.
----------------
Narrative POV
“Where could he be right now?” Ji Yong cursed out at the TV abusing the leathery
buttons on the remote furiously. The last time he saw maknae, was when he was
intimately too close to Changmin. He remembered how his eyes boiled at the sight of
them two sending secret messages through eye contacts. Finger nails imprinted his
obvious anger onto his cold palms. The most apparent thing was that he couldn’t think;
all he wanted to do was pull Seungri away.
Come to think of it, Ji Yong have been pulling his hair, and failing at taming his anger
for a few hours now. He decided to sit through the whole dinner with Sun Ye. His mind
wasn’t there with her. The whole time he was imagining what those two were doing.
Hugging?...holding hands?...
kissing?...no no!! Seungri would not do that. He is not gullible.
Ji Yong jumped out of his seat when the loud door bell echoes through the dorm. He
had schedule the moving to tomorrow, but now Ji Yong can’t seems to be sure about
himself anymore. He does not want to let Seungri go…
He ran toward to wooden frame, almost tripping over the shoes Daesung left strewn
carelessly on the ground. His toes curled up at the sudden contact with the cold.
He stood motionless, shock at the sight of Seungri half being carried, half leaning onto
Changmin. He was too close for Ji Yong liking, as a matter of fact, Ji Yong can almost
recognized Seungri little mumbles of refusal from being carried by Changmin. He took
that as a cue for him to lunge forward, steadying Seungri laxative state with his upper
body and wrapping his secured arms around the boy’s waist. He pushed Changmin
hands off, not needing anymore close proximity between them two.
Seungri gasped tightly at the change of movement. His breaths reek alcohol fuming Ji
Yong’s temper by the seconds. Bearing Seungri unconscious shape into his room, Ji
Yong went to undress him, taking off the clothes that were binding the maknae searing
body. He finally stopped when maknae looked soundly asleep, chest heaving in a
peaceful rhythm. Ji Yong wiped Seungri sweaty brows. Trying to calm himself Ji Yong
sat there staring at the slumbering form of his affection. His fists clenched at the
thought of Changmin still outside. They need to talk.
-------
“Hyung I can explain.” Changmin defended in breathy whispered refraining from
making any sound that could awake the maknae.
“Hyung mienhe *sorry*…I didn’t know he was going to drink that much, I---”
“Shut up!”
“What the FUCK were you thinking? Bringing him out so late? Do you know he is 18?
Or were you thinking of making him your toy for the night?! HUH?! Is that it Changmin?”
Ji Yong shouted, forgetting about the sleeping figure in the next room. He was blinded
with fury; all he could think was charging at Changmin, who only stood there
speechless.
“You are. You were the one playing with him! NOT ME!” Changmin retorted with a
strong and low voice. He was pissed at being accused, pissed that he couldn’t do
anything to comfort Seungri. Changmin looked into Ji Yong eyes, challenging the man
that stolen Seungri’s heart.
“What are you saying…huh!? Who do you think you are to talk about me?!” Ji Yong icy
voice spat out like venom. He was heading closer to Changmin. The intense gap
between them was too thick to cut. Changmin was ready for the blow coming his way.
When Ji Yong clutched him by the collar with strong fist aiming for his cheek, he never
blinked.
“hmmm…hey… Ji…why so loud? My head hurt….I---”
Seungri stood there, face drained of tint from the sight before his eyes. His visions
switching back and forth between Ji Yong’s clasped fist and Changmin reddened
cheek. Seungri breaths came out in short gasps. Nothing could compare to the panic
he felt right now.
“What is going on here?...”
-----------------------------